Teenage is the period when most of the changes take place in your child’s life. Neither he is a young child nor he is an adult. Parenting a teenager is a voyage for which parents need to change their parenting skills accordingly. They need to more effective parenting skills now.
- Moral development – Teenagers seek fairness and justice, they simply follow their parents’ beliefs and religion.
- Emotional Development – Due to changes in sexual organs, teenagers are highly aware if sexual responses and feelings. Outside stimulation easily arouses the teenagers.
- Social Development – Teenagers spend most of their time outside the home with friends, peers, school or coaching. It is entirely a different world where they get sensitive to what other people say or do, especially opposite sex.
- Intellectual Development – Teenagers want reason and reaction to everything. They are more likely to speak their mind and express by challenging traditional authority and beliefs.
- Physical Development – They get over obsessed with their body and changes they are going through. Even a pimple could be a disaster for them.
Connecting with Teenagers
- Limits and Discipline – It is important to discuss mutually and define the behavioral guidelines. You need to decide together what is acceptable and permissible.
- Dealing with sexual issues – Talk to your teenager about sex, educate about sex-related diseases and infections. Guide them with the help of relevant books or an expert.
- Support and Guide – Help your teen to clarify and reflect on his attitude and choices. Guide him from distance on career, money, school, friends, sexuality or dating.
- Communicate – Lack of communication creates the problem. As they need privacy, parents need to balance and follow some tips to communicate with a teenager.
- Accept the behavior – Teenager and parent relationship cannot be angelic. It is unrealistic to expect them to obey you and agree with you every time. Parents need to accept the behavior and crazy things done by their teen.
- Prepare and Respect – it is important to respect your teenager and prepare yourself for the changes in him. Get ready to accept an altogether unique teenager.
5 Weird but Effective Parenting Skills for Teenagers
The Power of Yet
All of us are aware of the fact that whatever words we say truly reflect back and create our world. Often our children say, ‘I’m not good at Mathematics or swimming or any other skill’ help your children to rectify this phrase by a simple add-on.
When you say I’m not good at this or that, it implies you have accepted the fact and you do not want to do anything about it. Help your children by adding the YET at the end.
I’m not good at Mathematics YET, but I could be good if I’ll practice daily or work little harder. YET gives them the opportunity to improve upon. Teach them that human beings have control over their mind, humans can be good at anything if they really want to be. They can achieve anything with the power of YET. Help your children to apply the power of YET and see the difference.
FAIL – First Attempt In Learning
You will be shocked by this suggestion but let your children fail and celebrate the failure. Yes, you read it right, it is one of the toughest but effective parenting skills. Nobody wants their children to get fail but the chances are they might fail at some point in their life.
Many famous people who turned out to be successful have failed at least once during their career. It doesn’t mean it is the end of the world. Without failure, there is no success. Failure is not an option but a part of success or say the first step of the ladder reaching towards success.
Approach your children and tell them that FAIL is First Attempt in Learning. It is proof that you tried. It will help them to reduce stress, anxiety and will keep them going in life.
According to the Science of neuroplasticity, our brain develops every day according to what we do until the day we die. Tell children that their brain will keep on changing depending on what they are doing. These effective parenting skills will help them to do better.
Encourage your teenagers with a growth mindset. If they have achieved something, do not only praise them with a fixed mindset. But praise them with a growth mindset and get them to start thinking about what they have to do next.
Give them positive feedback which develops their brain and helps them to keep growing. For example, if your child got 98% marks, he will be very happy as he topped the class this time. You will praise him for his hard work, this is the fixed mindset. You need to add a growth mindset along with this appreciation, they need to keep working hard to achieve the same or better result next time.
The basic principle of growth in life is simple – never compete with others but with yourself. Try to get better than yourself in every attempt. This is one of the best and effective parenting skills which I use often.
Focus on Strengths
Parents usually focus on the things in which children are not good. We forget the things which they are good at and forget to focus on their strengths, instead, we keep our focus to improve their weak areas.
The Science of Happiness tells us to find out the strengths of our children and focus more on that. Focusing on their strengths will help them to be happier and successful. When we’ll focus on their strengths, they can apply their strengths to improve their weaknesses.
Active Constructive Responding
These effective parenting skills will tremendously help you in life, especially while dealing with your children. The way we respond to a bad news is equally important or say more important how we respond to a good news.
When our children tell us about an A grade in English, we ask them about Science. We need to respond actively and constructively to the good news which they told us. Praise them and ask them to give you more details. Show them you are happy and interested. This will bring out their positive emotions. They will be really happy to bring good news to you again if you respond enthusiastically and take the interest.
Stay with them at the moment and share their happiness, ask them how they felt and what they will do next to keep it up. If you ignore, they will not get support and encouragement to do better next time.
Have more tools to add to the list of effective parenting skills? Please share with us your effective parenting skills in the comments section below.
Wish you a very Happy Teenage Parenting!